I’ve held back from blogging and most other things. I was stretched. It was a world I wasn’t happy in. The rules weren’t mine. How can I live happily if I don’t even know who I am, let alone what to be and do? Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Social Anxiety own me so much there’s no room for anything else.
So I took a moment to ask who am I?
And the response was …. tumble weeds. I had no idea. It’s like my whole life was fake. So much time spent pleasing others that I don’t even know when I was happy.
How to move forward when the past was so flaky?
Well as with most things we need a solid foundation and so doing anything therefore was put on poor ground.
So is now okay?
Well kind of. I mean it’s not perfect and that’s good. Looking for perfection has been one of my life’s problems. You see it’s something we can’t achieve and quite rightly don’t need.
Twitter has been a kind of guilt free blogging for me. I can do something small and be fine with that. Recently I tweeted:
“Reaching out for help is not a failure. It is not a competency issue. It is purely a health issue.https://twitter.com/NigelMOpenshaw
I reached out and my health has improved.
Long way to go.
Hope you’re well. If not reach out😀
mentalhealth #anxiety #socialanxiety #wellbeing #healthmatters“
Something is better than striving for perfection.
So, my problem has been anxiety for as long as I can remember. It’s sad to say but accepting it now is a step in the right way.
I am not a failure, but I am in fact I’ll. This is not a competency issue but a mental health issue.
I was reading about someone who has gone through similar situation. They were afraid of reaching out for being labelled a failure. Fiona Thomas recently did an article on avoidance for a magazine called Happiful.
And that’s it.
We can reach out. I did and it took way too long to do that.
I always have this I should have done it beforehand moment. That’s my mind telling me you’ve done the right thing.
Reaching out for help is always the right thing.
Don’t suffer in silence. It achieves nothing.